How to Housebreak a Puppy

[Rudiki]

How to Housebreak a Puppy (a quick and not-so-dirty guide):

Vigilance and consistency and praise are the keys. Watch Puppy like a hawk! Take Puppy outside often; give him plenty of chances to go. Hustle him out EVERY time he wakes up from a nap, after EVERY play session, after EVERY meal. These are times it is likely Puppy will need to go. Whenever Puppy is awake, be watching Puppy. Do not wait until you see him start to squat to take him out. If you do see him circling and sniffing and looking for a spot, scoop him up and get him outside quick! If Puppy wakes up from his nap and you're on the phone (or fighting a bunch of Orcs...), drop what you are doing and rush to let the puppy out. Puppies can't wait a minute; they have to go NOW. Ideally you want to forestall any accidents in the house at all. Yes, it is a certain amount of work watching Puppy like this, but if you put in the work now, you will have a dog you don't have to spend a lot of time and worry on for the rest of his life. It is so worth it.

When you get outside, put Puppy down and say your "go pee" command. This command will come in handy later when it is pouring down rain in some motel parking lot at 2 in the morning. I use "hurry up". Keep repeating your command encouragingly as Puppy looks for the perfect spot. As soon as Puppy starts to go, praise him long and loud. Praise him to the skies. Praise him while he is going, so he knows what you are praising him for. Be lavish with praise. Act as if he has just pulled Timmy from the well. Act as if he is pooping gold nuggets. Go back inside with Puppy.

Sometimes, of course, Puppy will have an accident in the house. This will be because you were momentarily inattentive (which everybody is at times). If you catch him in the act, give a sharp "Ah-Ah!" or "No!", and hustle him right on outside. If you do not catch him in the act, clean it up and go on with your life. Don't bother dragging the puppy over and showing it to him and yelling at him; it won't help. Never rub Puppy's nose in his mess. All this gets you is a yucky puppy nose that you then have to clean off; more work for you. Never punish a dog unless the dog already knows what it did wrong. If Puppy does not understand why he is being punished, he will think: "Wow, this guy just randomly smacks puppies; better stay away from him!" It is a waste of time to discipline a dog that does not know why it is being disciplined. Reserve punishment for willful disobedience.

If you do the above, Puppy will catch on pretty quickly, and will start asking to go out when he has to go. When he does, again, drop everything and rush to open that door for him. You can hang a string of bells on the door and Puppy will catch on quickly that you'll come running when you hear the bells. You have an advantage in that dogs don't like to soil their dens, and your house is Puppy's den. I have never had any problems housebreaking puppies this way. Mine have all gotten the basic hang of it in just a few weeks, though it may well take longer for some; each puppy is different. The more vigilant you are, the fewer accidents in the house, and the quicker the process will be. Be patient, don't get mad. There will be a certain amount of mess and work, same as with people-babies. It comes with the territory. Keep going until Puppy gets it. That's really all there is to it.