The Stella Awards....

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Psye Shaar
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The Stella Awards....

Post by Psye Shaar »

Got sent this at work... can't work out which is worse.. the claims, or the fact they got awarded anything at all :shock:


It's once again time to review the winners of the annual Stella awards.

The Stella's are named after 81 year old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonalds . That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in the United States. Unfortunately the most recent lawsuit implicating McDonald's, the teens who allege that eating at McDonnell's has made them fat, was filed after the 2002 award voting was closed. This suit will top the 2003 awards list without question.

5th place (Tied)

Kathleen Robertson of Austin Texas was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving toddler was Ms Robertson's Son.

5th place (Tied)

19 year old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently did not notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal 0the hubcaps.

5th place (Tied)

Terrence Dickson of Bristol Pennsylvania was leaving a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He could not re-enter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family were on vacation and Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for 8 days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the houseowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The Jury agreed to the tune of $500,000.

4th place

Jerry Williams of Little Rock Arkansas was awarded $14,500 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's Beagle dog. The Beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been a little provoked at the time as Mr. Williams who had climbed over the fence into the yard was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

3rd place

A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster Pennsylvania $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her coccyx. The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

2nd place

Kara Walton of Claymont Delaware sued the owner of a Night Club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out two of her front teeth. This occurred whilst Ms. Walton was trying to crawl through the window in the Ladies Room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

1st Place

This year's runaway winner was Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new Winnebago Motor Home. On his trip home from an OU football game, having driven onto the Freeway, he set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the drivers seat to go into the back and make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly the RV left the Freeway, crashed and overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him that in the owner's manual that he could not actually do this. The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new Winnebago Motor Home. The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit just in case there were any other complete morons buying their recreation vehicles.


Gotta love the courts all over the world for these kind of things... :roll:

Still.. made me laugh :P
[i]"Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from a religious conviction." [/i]
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Post by Idonia »

The Darwin and Stella awards... good laughs.
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silverdragonams
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Post by silverdragonams »

I bet a lot of those lawsuits were in California. The legal system out here is ridiculous.

When we moved into our apartment, we had to sign every page of a 60 page lease, aknowleging everything from the pet policy to the fact the land lords are not responsible for sickness caused by mold spores (even though they leave the sprinklers on 12 hours a day) or your neighbors peeking in your windows. :roll:

Now that we are moving out, we just had to do another pile of paperwork. Including a Statement that we will be vacating the premises in 30 days, and right afterward: a Statement stating that we signed the Statement about vacating the premises....
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Jskee
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Post by Jskee »

silverdragonams wrote:..Including a Statement that we will be vacating the premises in 30 days, and right afterward: a Statement stating that we signed the Statement about vacating the premises....
LOL

*cues music*

"Oh..ah...Living in America....!"

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Re: The Stella Awards....

Post by Traces Of Reality »

Psye Shaar wrote:Unfortunately the most recent lawsuit implicating McDonald's, the teens who allege that eating at McDonnell's has made them fat
That's a load of bull..... places make this food for people to eat, they don't force them to eat it and you certainly don't make fast food your everday meal. What happens when you do? Simple, you gain weight and you keep gaining the weight if you continue this poor diet. Exercise and eat healthier. I know I did when my ass started getting chunky from having an unhealthy diet.

These morons have a decision on wether or not they wanna be hogs and make fast food places their second home. I know I would up and stop if I noticed my rump getting bigger than I wanted.... why do these idiots continue eating this crap if they notice themselves getting fatter and fatter? It's simple, they're too f**cking lazy to stop their bad habbit and they're too used to going to places where the food is being made for them.

Cooking a healthy meal can be fun sometimes (except for washing the dishes if you don't have a dishwasher :D ) and there ARE food places that have alot of healthy goodies to choose from. Asian being one.

If I had to vote for the most stupid country, I'd vote for America. Not to be harsh against my own homeland, but come on now... wtf? USA seems to be one of the most screwed up places on Earth. These people who whine about fast food places making them fat should be locked away, forced to eat a healthy diet and exercise until they're healthier.

I just find it a damn shame that people... supposedly the most intelligent beings on Earth... pull some of the world's most stupid crap.



My favorite magaizines, I always find so many friggin' exercises I like that I actually have a hard time picking a couple to do :P
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Traces Of Reality
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Post by Traces Of Reality »

Oh dear....just read the rest of your post and my gods..... I NOW believe the most intelligent beings on our somewhat still beautiful planet Earth is definitly NOT human beings.


Sorry, I couldn't resist putting an adorable pic of one of my favorite critters here. Oh, this little fellow is a Platypus..... one of our intelliegent lil' creatures! *wants one*

Image
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Psye Shaar
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Post by Psye Shaar »

Upholstery_imp wrote:The Darwin and Stella awards
Ironically found an email for the Darwin awards in my inbox this morning.... so for all your reading pleasure:

1. When his 38-calibre revolver failed to fire at his intended victim
during a holdup in Long Beach, California, would be robber James Elliot did
something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.....

And now, the honourable mentions:

2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting
machine and, after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his
insurance company.The company suspecting negligence, sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

3. A man who shovelled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his Vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.

4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver
found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from
Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies.

The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head
wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter,
and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cashdrawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer...$15. (If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?)


7. A thief burst into a Florida bank one day wearing a ski mask and
carrying a gun. Aiming his gun at the guard, the thief yelled, "FREEZE,
MOTHER-STICKERS, THIS IS A **** UP!" For a moment, everyone was silent. Then the sniggers started. The security guard completely lost it and
doubled over laughing. It probably saved his life, because he'd been about
to draw his gun. He couldn't have drawn and fired before the thief got him. The thief ran away and is still at large. In memory of the event, the banker later put a plaque on the wall engraved with the words, "Freeze, mother-stickers, this is a ****-up!"

8. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinderblock through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinderblock and heaved it over his head at the window.
The cinderblock bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head,
knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas.
The whole event was caught on videotape.

9. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."

10. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a
Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan, at 5 a.m., flashed a gun, and demanded
cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.

A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER!

11. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges, saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.

:D :P :D
Last edited by Psye Shaar on Mon Dec 05, 2005 2:39 pm, edited 1 time in total.
[i]"Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from a religious conviction." [/i]
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Post by Starslayer_D »

It is all about positive behavior reinforcement. You reward people for making moronic lawsuits, what will you get? More morons making lawsuits.

There is a little bit missing from the legal system there. The assumption that common sense is to be used, and lack of selfsame doesn't give you any claim for recompensation.
The other thing missing is a sensible upper limit for recompensations. Here in germany, the guy who got bitten by the dog most likely would have had to pay for tresspassing, but, as the dog was rightly secured (chained in fenced in Yard), no liability by the dogowner is given, as the dogowner executed due caution with his dog.
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Post by MuckTheWizard »

try doing a snopes search on this one.

:(
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